Recently I was in a wedding. One of my best friends married his high school sweetheart, I lived with them all through college and couldn’t be happier. My mother recently sent this picture to me, I couldn’t believe it, but it’s him and I performing during a first grade assembly. How appropriate.
After doing some research (read: thinking about it), I’ve determined that Hugh Hefner, creator of Playboy magazine, is gay. I realize this is a bold statement, but I am prepared to back up this statement with some pretty compelling evidence. You be the judge.
Article #1: Hugh is always wearing silk pajamas, and enjoys eating ice cream while watching movies in bed. If you replaces “Hugh” with “Pamela”, I wouldn’t think anything of it. The fact is no self-respecting guy is going to admit (much less brag about it) to that, regardless of wealth or status. “What are you up to tonight Brian, want to grab a beer? No sorry dude I’m going home to toss my silk pj’s on and watch reruns of ‘Casablanca’ while dominating some ‘Chunky Monkey’”. Not happening.
Article #2: Hugh always hangs out with old, equally creepy men. Even at Hugh’s big parties, you’ll see a half dozen old men also in there silk pj’s. This itself isn’t weird, but that they are surrounded by blond bombshells and not even looking at them is. “Hey Larry, why do these girls keeps pestering us, I just want to talk about stocks and stuff!”
Article #3: Hugh has a whole room. For his shoes. No comment.
Article #4: Hugh’s “girlfriends” are never jealous of each other. As we all know, women can get jealous. Really jealous. And that’s only when they’re with one guy in a monogamous relationship. I CANNOT imagine the fights 3 to 7 petty, materialistic women all sharing the same 81 year old man would have. But they all seem happy, blank, and content. They aren’t jealous because their is nothing to be jealous about.
Article #5: Playboy is a gay man’s interpretation of a straight man’s fantasy. By no means am I saying the women aren’t beautiful. They are. But they’re all the same. And they’re all modeled after a certain doll every 6 year-old girl owned. I’ll give you a hint, it starts with a “B” and ends with an “arbie”.
db clay and our new Version 3 are getting some attention from the online community this week… Yesterday we were featured on NotCot.com, today on Thrilllist.com, and tomorrow on OhGizmo.com! These are three of the most followed blog sites on the web, and we appreciate the kind words they have for our products.
The current wallet I carry is:
This is a revisit of my weird animal videos, this one was sent to me by a friend. It is kinda sad, but I have rarely laughed harder at another’s pain.
Unofficially of course. I’m not a pop culture fan, but I couldn’t resist watching and now posting this when I heard about it on the radio. This performance is more comedic than sad, Britney Spears looks like she drank a pint of rubbing alcohol and snorted a line of powdered sugar off P Diddy’s ass before she came on stage. She can needs help walking down a step in the middle of the performance- oh Britney, what have you become?
Immediately afterward Sarah Silverman does an appropriately timed bit about how Britney’s career is over. I’m sure it was planned, but it rang so true that people could barely laugh they felt so bad. Suffice to say I had no trouble crying with laughter.
In this life, we can't control much. But control isn't what this life is about. My life isn't about the destination- it's about the journey. With that said, this site is a reflection of the happenings of my life.
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